I need anger management.

Counseling, theraphy, whatever.

At least after that first line, I've mellowed down a bit.

Earlier my thoughts were jumbled up between stuff that I want to scream out, and stupid stuff nobody should ever think of.

Here's the jumbled 'mind':

Kick the door. Slam the car. Break something. Cry. I never listen to you. We never listen to you. If you say you can only do things when you're around, it's like I may as well find someone here. If you want to give and expect something in return, please don't. Run away from home. Can't run away from problems. Playing games make you forget the problems. You seem to forget how cranky you used to be after work, and you expect me to be so energized after? Why are you making it so hard? You don't understand, you think you know me but you don't. Why can't you do things yourself?? There's no initiative anywhere. Just because YOU like to snoop around, doesn't mean everyone else does. You always feel like there's eyes watching you. You have double standards. You don't try enough. There's always limitations. You're so into showing off to other people. What happened to simplicity, moderation and humility? Break something, break something now. Curl up in a corner, forget everyone else. Lose everyone else. Kick it. Alone, stay alone. DON'T make me choose. I need to talk to someone. I need to see someone. I have noone to talk to. NOBODY can comfort me. Nobody cares. They say they do. But they just want to control you. I'm stupid. So what if I am. You've been rude, that is not cool and I've lost a lot of respect for you. It's all about pleasing you, you don't care how I feel, how I felt. You're the one who left me to be like this and you're still continuing to do it. Because you weren't around I had to be there. Because you won't listen I had to. Who listens to me? You think I have so much money?? JUST STOP with that double standards. You raised me up to follow the rules and now you keep prodding me to break them. You won't listen. You're too stubborn with your damn narrow mindedness to push beyond. You're stuck in a room even when there's a door. It's always about what you can't do, and exerting your limitations. It's ALWAYS about what you can't do. How could you say things like that, I've never thought you to be that narrow minded. I'm so not surprised you had to find others to back you up. YOU DON'T care about my needs. I'M SURE you will always say that you care, BUT IF YOU REALLY DO I won't feel damn angry and fucked up. MAYBE I am meant to be alone. You want to be like all the people around you, why can't you just appreciate what you have? WHAT'S with all these clutter? Is it THAT HARD to reply? WHY DO YOU BOTHER? To pretend that you care? Why are you so easily influenced by peer pressure? Why are you so embarrassed by us? If you can't fulfill my needs regardless where you are, what's the point of the relationship in the first place? I like skirts. Don't freakin' forget and drop things like a hot potato. Screw it, I don't know what 'family' means. What happened to respect and diversity? Compromise? You CAN'T always get what you want. Can I smash this partition? Why so fancy? Why is it you care so much what other say about you, but not so much what we say about you? Do they really care for you? Why don't they ever visit you?

I need help. AND at this rate, I'm NOT gonna get any. Negative remarks will be ignored.