Why do we shout?

A good friend and colleague of mine shared a story via e-mail, which is almost like this story below. (The difference was that in his story, it was a 'guru' rather than a 'saint'). I don't know where the story originated, but it's nice anyway.

A saint asked his disciples, ‘Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?’
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, ‘Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.’
‘But, why to shout when the other person is just next to you?’ asked the saint. ‘Isn’t it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you’re angry?’
Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the saint.
Finally he explained, ‘When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.’

Then the saint asked, ‘What happens when two people are in love with each other? They don’t shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small…’

The saint continued, ‘When they love each other even more, what happens?
They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that’s all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.’

MORAL: When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.


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My first thought about why I shout when I'm angry, was because I felt like the other didn't listen. And I guess when you associate the scenario of someone not hearing you, you shout louder in hopes they will listen.

I think it applies the same for online chatting. You start using CAPS LOCK because you feel the other person is not reading what you're typing.